tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36259912011-04-21T21:49:21.602-05:00lisaashThe life and times of.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comBlogger2001100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-9795904368635499172007-04-23T18:34:00.000-05:002007-04-23T18:43:54.036-05:00I heard the girls upstairs talking and stopped on the stairs. Emma was saying that she thought that her Sweet 16 would be the best day of her life. Morgan said she thought that being a teenager would be the Best Thing ever, but it seemed so long away. "Even after my big sister is a teenager, I still have to wait". Then Morgan said, "I think the best day of my life will be the day I get Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1165888926377101492006-12-11T20:00:00.000-06:002006-12-11T20:02:06.396-06:00Morgan: "I stepped on something!!!!"Me: "Like the tack strip from the carpet?! Something painful?!"Morgan: "No, like mashed potatoes."Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1159846190267731272006-10-02T22:28:00.000-05:002006-10-02T22:29:50.273-05:00 Sloppy NotJoes Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1159395049862385722006-09-27T17:10:00.000-05:002006-09-27T17:10:49.876-05:00I told Morg that she was a very easy-going girl. She said, "Yeah, flexible".Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1159373127611758312006-09-27T11:03:00.000-05:002006-09-27T11:05:27.630-05:00One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you smallThe piano tuner is here and I'm running the gambit of songs in my head/under my breath based on whatever the combinations of notes he is poking on. I've gone from White Rabbit to Phantom of the Opera to Oh Come All Ye Faithful. It's trippy.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1158071975933324292006-09-12T09:27:00.000-05:002006-09-12T09:39:36.010-05:00Ah, Sweet YouthEven though Morgan is often the most challenging in the morning, she was very cooperative today because she liked her outfit (Sophia anyone?). When she got out of the van at school, I said, "Love you..." and before she closed the door, she said, "Love you more!" Having recently read this piece at hipmama, I almost cried.These people called me yesterday morning (at 8:30 a.m., mindLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1157778703504467802006-09-09T00:07:00.000-05:002007-10-18T20:45:14.473-05:00A Little Shug Avery Pee In ItTonight, after I got home from a great dinner with the neighbors, I was handed the remote. I immediately found The Color Purple and switched to it, hoping for some Shug Avery - just to rationalize my dog, if nothing else. What I got was a raw flashback to being nineteen, lying on the couch on Beaumont watching the Color Purple all of the summer of 1987. And a Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1156477288707615532006-08-24T22:39:00.000-05:002006-08-24T22:41:28.716-05:00I've been sitting here in a Dooce-induced coma for over an hour. I was shipping, but lost interest as it became further and further from the time since the post office closed. I continue to crack myself up though. Despite sitting here reading the archives nonstop, I occasionally glance over at my Google Sidebar Todo list as if there will be something that I can check off.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1156362320397469292006-08-23T14:42:00.000-05:002006-08-23T14:45:20.413-05:00I don't know why I do these things, but I do. I've been suffering from some viscous gas since eating pasta salad with beans last night. As in, so bad the dogs have been looking at me like, "What the hell?" So with stomach growling this afternoon, I make my choice ... and eat half a container of spicy hummus. I may explode.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1155702406091747522006-08-15T23:08:00.000-05:002006-08-15T23:26:46.226-05:00Today a giving and saintly friend came over to help me organize my life (we discussed throwing a match to the whole mess more than once). In other saintly undertakings, she also went with the girls and I to w*lmart, sea of the plebs, and Lowe's. W*lmart was horrific, as usual, but brief in that we picked up our items while the vision girlie measured the girl's heads and questioned them with Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1155615999566572842006-08-14T23:14:00.000-05:002006-08-14T23:27:14.826-05:00Full-Time BloggingSince I've been reading the Dooce archives from the beginning (already being fairly hip and knowing the term Dooced and also having read "Have You Reconvened Your Procedure") for the past three days, I'm blogging in my own head practically all of the time. I'm just full of it over here, but it seems to be a long way from random blogging in my head to sitting here typing it (Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1151161065248090872006-06-24T09:53:00.000-05:002006-06-24T09:57:45.260-05:00I thought my bird was going completely crazy. He's been super excitable (in the carnal sense) and suddenly bent on paper shredding. He's been doing a corner in his cage every day after I clean it. I also let him out for hours a day and instead of doing his daily show or even preening, he's going under his cage to shred more. And I mean more - there is a full-blown nest under there.And guess Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1151015677190531992006-06-22T17:32:00.000-05:002006-06-22T17:34:37.210-05:00I always like it when I hear a couple of virgin thrift store customers, typically teens, walking out of the store with their purchases. One says to the other, "It was only TWO DOLLARS!" in complete, utter amazement. They are sure they have uncovered some closely guarded secret. Ah, young 'uns brought up in a retail environment are so amusing.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1149311136556896112006-06-03T00:03:00.000-05:002006-06-03T00:05:36.570-05:00Shug just fell asleep with her snout in her waterbowl. No shit. I would have grabbed a photo if I didn't feel like it was that or her life. I pulled her out and put her on dry land. She's not really ready for prime time obviously.OTOH:Find your own pose!Really, I could have done better if it hadn't been for the 'don't think much before you answer people' part.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1148918698038633992006-05-29T11:01:00.000-05:002006-05-29T11:04:58.050-05:00Emma's 9th birthday. So big. So casual about it. Nine years ago today, it was starting to get really ugly. Her heartrate was beginning to go down with every contraction and I was dilated to 10. Pushing, pulling and panic would ensue.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1147407216431068062006-05-11T23:12:00.000-05:002006-05-11T23:13:36.450-05:00Last week, on the way to the airport, I said something to Mom about taking real sleeping pills so that she could have caffeine after noon. She said, "You know I don't like that Elvis shit."Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1145546138509005562006-04-20T10:14:00.000-05:002006-04-20T10:15:38.516-05:00I love it when the dog is looking like he's really thinking about something. He looks so noble, so complex. Of course, he's probably thinking about licking his ass, but anyway.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1145467804437401192006-04-19T12:29:00.000-05:002006-04-19T12:30:04.443-05:00 I was in the bathroom putting my hair up into a bun. Morgan was staring at me from her breakfast vantage point. I finished and looked at her and she said, "I was fascinated". Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1145316401852482492006-04-17T18:09:00.000-05:002006-04-17T18:26:41.863-05:00A New LoveThis was my first day in a while that I was anticipating doing nothing. Well, not nothing. I had to call the vet, deposit some checks and mail some packages, but no extended commitments. With the kids on Spring Break, my BFF here from Texas, a playgroup reunion and then Easter, I was getting rather overextended. I had been looking forward to doing very little, all alone, all day. Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1143579436933526272006-03-28T14:56:00.000-06:002006-03-28T14:57:16.946-06:00Two things: I've been out among the plebs all day. And, as Andy Tebbe at AEL used to say, "I'm busier than a one-legged man at an ass-kicking contest".Second: You can make practically any song about a bird. Examples: Coco Doodle Dandy, Bird to the Bone.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1142266034123472712006-03-13T10:06:00.000-06:002006-03-13T10:10:37.266-06:00I Looked At Him, He Looked At Me So yes, the cat is watching the bird in predatory fascination. She's a little confused by his apparent lack of fear with regard to her. She normally ignores him, but today it's harder because I've put a seed catalog in the bottom of his cage. Apparently he is sitty because he's been crouched down on it tearing it to shreds, seemingly making a nest. If he Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1139705389963249592006-02-11T18:23:00.000-06:002006-02-11T18:49:49.973-06:00From the Pain In My Ass Department: Went to a thrift store today that I hadn't been too in some time (okay, two years) and found the store-front empty/vacant and for lease. Well. I drove 7 miles out of my way too. Shit. Drove around the area (mall area, loads of strip malls just thirsting for a resale shop) and found only three, say it again, three Adult Toy shops. I don't think I've even Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1138833244518877212006-02-01T16:27:00.000-06:002006-02-01T16:34:04.530-06:00Note to self: Next time desire chicken salad, buy it at Whole Foods. Cost = no object.Needless to say, I just made chicken salad. What a pain in the ass! After making the 'easy mayo sauce', I decided to double the recipe (one cup of chicken, pul-leeze) and doubled the sauce. Then, reading down - I see that only 3 T. of such sauce is required. Needless to say, I have an abundance of this Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1138826064627811832006-02-01T14:12:00.000-06:002006-02-01T14:35:58.876-06:00There is a noticeable lack of fat grams in my Lean Cuisine. I think the copious amount of basil is supposed to distract you from it. I noticed the basil, but I also noticed my immediate desire to cover it with parmesan. I was out and about today (washed van! returned item! returned clothes to school nurse! finally went to bank!), it suddenly came to my attention that I was wearing Mom Jeans. Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1138804731686214502006-02-01T08:29:00.000-06:002006-02-01T08:38:51.696-06:00A-P week forges on with freecycling, spot treatment on listing items, mailing odds and ends, and (drumroll please) exercise! That's right - after a year (I'd guess) - I tried out Jennifer's eliptical and turned my muscle-free legs into spasming rubber bands. Today's plans include listing some suits I've had forever, sorting all of the Got To Go clothing and maybe (shrinks back in fear and Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1138731519914990802006-01-31T12:15:00.000-06:002006-01-31T12:18:39.926-06:00You may be wondering what I've gotten done here on Day 2 of Anti-Procrastination week. Oh, I'm sure you're curious. Well. I filled out and mailed health insurance forms. I paid ambulance bills from September. I called for even more medical statements to file. I'm a glutton over here. Next up? Tax form review and maybe even a huge PI (procrastinated item).Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1138717833276885642006-01-31T08:19:00.000-06:002006-01-31T08:30:33.286-06:00Well, it's anti-procrastination week for me and this is certainly on that list. Blogging, that is. In other areas I have parsed Morgan's closet and also taken her to order new glasses. Hers have been lost for about 6 weeks. I give! Today I intend to file some insurance forms from 2005 and start the taxes. There are so many opportunities for anti-procrastination -- it boggles the mind.In Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1132110399700568602005-11-15T21:04:00.000-06:002005-11-15T21:06:39.710-06:00Emma, playing video games, "I just made it through the sausage train!!!!"Jennifer, from the computer, "Yeah . . . if I had a nickel for every time I said that."Tales from Juror #12 coming soon.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1124724759316331552005-08-22T10:20:00.000-05:002005-08-22T10:32:39.323-05:00Well, well, the first day of school. It was frantic, but it went off without a hitch (but for a bit of lateness). Both girls went to bed a little spazzed out, so I was hoping that the morning wouldn't continue in the same horror. Thankfully, it didn't. The alarm goes off and Morgan's job is to wake up me and Emma. Thank goodness she did because I was NO WHERE near waking up at 8 a.m. Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1115562325167569222005-05-08T09:20:00.000-05:002005-05-08T09:25:25.213-05:00Those Little BratsJust last week, Morgan told me that she and Quincy (girl in her class) weren't friends any more because Q. is friends with Jordan and Jordan won't let Q. be friends with anyone else. These girls are all just two weeks away from completing Kindergarten. I thought that was impressively young of Jordan, but alas!Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1113394325698495522005-04-13T07:07:00.000-05:002005-04-13T07:12:05.700-05:00Having a dream about being late for a church rummage sale is better than having a dream about being late to meet your crystal meth dealer. I guess. It's still feels pertty lame.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1113362508511324772005-04-12T22:21:00.000-05:002005-04-12T22:21:48.510-05:00Well, Brittany Spears is pregnant. Drats. I was hoping she was getting fat.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1113269277613296912005-04-11T20:27:00.000-05:002005-04-11T20:27:57.613-05:00Have you ever tried putting a silky 100% polyester suit into a small plastic bag? I just did. It was quite the challenge. Like putting an octopus in a net bag and not letting any tentacles stick out.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1113241575356890872005-04-11T12:43:00.000-05:002005-04-11T12:46:15.356-05:00Why do people give a flying fuck who called their house. Someone just called me to see why I'd called her fucking house. Well, Ms. Thing, I was calling to RSVP for your child's party -- is THAT OKAY? This is certainly not the first time I've gotten this. In fact, just last week, I misdialed Steve's cell phone number and some dude called me hours later to find out why I'd called. Make better Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1113226251197143852005-04-11T08:24:00.000-05:002005-04-11T08:30:51.196-05:00It's back to school this morning and I must say, thank goodness. Lots of fighting and "I don't have anything to doooooo....." Arrrgh, makes my ears bleed.Saturday at Sara's the girls were playing a game involving chalk paths and at one point Sara told me that they went to a funeral of the brother of a friend of hers (Morgan's) and after that, they crucified him. I think (I hope) they meant Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1112931024171152232005-04-07T22:29:00.000-05:002005-04-07T22:30:24.173-05:00Quite possibly the greatest line from Deadwood ever:"You cannot fuck the future sir; the future fucks you!"Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1112846096946987152005-04-06T22:53:00.000-05:002005-04-06T22:54:56.946-05:00Yesterday, at 8:50 a.m. (leaving for school time is 9 a.m.), my bratty five-year-old Morg comes to the doorway of the room where I'm slacking off. She puts her hand on her cocked hip and says, "Girl, you betta get off your butt and make my lunch". And after I mocked horror, made her beg and call my Sugar Mama, I did just that.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1112845882199054322005-04-06T22:50:00.000-05:002005-04-06T22:51:22.200-05:00This pimple either needs to concede or develop into a horn. Whichever, I'm sick of the limbo.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1112283771024980622005-03-31T09:00:00.000-06:002005-03-31T09:44:40.160-06:00I went to a funeral for a person I didn’t know yesterday. Since this was the fact, I stupidly didn’t take any tissue with me. Apparently, I’d forgotten that I’m a sympathetic crier. As in, I could go into a funeral of complete strangers and weep like a relative. So, tissue-free, I was stuck there wiping and sniffling for a full hour. Not helping was the fact that we sat behind the children, Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1112061639281664502005-03-28T19:59:00.000-06:002005-03-28T20:00:39.283-06:00Emma is writing a paragraph from her spelling words for homework. She asks, "Should I put catastrophe marks around this?"Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1111940666370682912005-03-27T10:23:00.000-06:002005-03-27T10:26:06.606-06:00Morgan finally agreed to help from her Daddy in getting rid of her dangling front teeth.Click to view supersized imageLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1110811184465047152005-03-14T08:28:00.000-06:002005-03-14T08:39:44.466-06:00So my kid is back from the brink of pneumonia. Of course, this weekend, right after her diagnosis, I see that a 31-year-old actress died of the same, after being turned away from the hospital (as "not sick"). God, shivvers.My husband has been practicing for weeks for his first fishing tournament (after 50 years of fishing). I called him around 2:30 pm yesterday afternoon (not really notin the Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1110730923246821962005-03-13T10:18:00.000-06:002005-03-13T10:22:03.246-06:00Looking out my kitchen window, I saw a dove sitting atop the basketball backboard. She appeared to be giving the Coco Classic "One-Eye" to something on the ground. I couldn't believe my own eye! Wild birds are so differently shaped than parrots, they don't have the actual distict neck to head thing going on. However, doves are different - definite neck (for rubbernecking). Upon further Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1108827788207648472005-02-19T09:41:00.000-06:002005-02-19T09:43:08.210-06:00Grammy was watching the news Thursday night and the kids were in the living room fooling around. Emma saw the name flash on the screen and said, "Oh! The Oh Really Factory!"Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1106747685621116672005-01-26T07:35:00.000-06:002005-01-26T07:54:45.623-06:00I just voraciously consumed a great novel, The Devil Wears Prada. I finished it up and hoped against hope that it was a true story and, hurrah, it is! I recommend it as entertaining reading, even if you aren't interested at all in fashion. Be warned that it will make you feel hopelessly poor and slovenly dressed, even if you, (like me) aren't dressed in Three Stooges boxers.
I spend two lovelyLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1106523502899714622005-01-23T17:34:00.000-06:002005-01-23T17:38:22.900-06:00Mystery Solved
I've always raved on and on about how there was So Much More snow when I was a kid. Now, my kids are enthralled and amazed by 1-2 inches. And it never stays very long. I found some weather history and it's very telling. In 1977 and 1978 (when I was 9 and 10) it snowed 44 inches each year. And in '78, the snow cover stayed on 71 days. I think that was the year that our house Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1104548664159485292004-12-31T21:03:00.000-06:002004-12-31T21:04:24.160-06:00Emma said her fart smelled like sparkles. Morgan said, "No! It smells like fire." Emma replied, "Good point".
Happy New Year!Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1103471236688927832004-12-19T09:39:00.000-06:002004-12-19T09:47:16.686-06:00He Like It, He Really Likes It!
I am sitting here and I hear an unusual sound from The Cage. Coco is picking at his pinata! I was starting to begin to give up hope! Of course, yesterday I stuck a peanut on it, so that may have helped. Whatever the case, after he saw me see him, he's stopped. Drat!
Shiver. Coldy today. Temperature 13, feels like -1. Zowie. Tomorrow 38 though. Then after Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1102995669706412442004-12-13T21:28:00.000-06:002004-12-13T21:41:09.706-06:00It's cold here, very winterish. People are shocked, just shocked. I'm just trying to avoid it myself. Actually surprisingly easy to do. Michelle went to the store for me today. However, I did have to venture out to the dentist. I had a tooth filled last Monday and that night, it cracked off. Shit.
While I was out, I decided to stop at Petsmart to get some female guppies (and relieve the Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1102781115931357532004-12-11T10:03:00.000-06:002004-12-11T10:05:15.930-06:00We went to Michelle's on Wednesday night. Thursday morning the girls were getting ready. They were excited because they were going on a field trip to see the drama club perform at the high school. Victoria was also going on a field trip with her school.
Morgan: "They are going to go to school and go on a field trip, then they'll ride the bus home and fight all night." That pretty much sums Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1102137418748219082004-12-03T23:12:00.000-06:002004-12-03T23:16:58.746-06:00Boys In The Middle
Remember the movie, Boys On The Side? Well, that's true. Except that boys are in the middle. You have your girlfriends in school (and sometimes they torture you), then you have your girlfriends for real, the good girlfriends. Then you have the boys, the men you decide to mate with - so you can have your babies. Then the breeding years pass and wham, you have your Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1102137130798295862004-12-03T21:06:00.000-06:002004-12-03T23:12:10.796-06:00Cats are Great, Plus More
I realized tonight that cats are the bomb in regards to replacing babies. They totally take care of themselves, number one. Everyone, especially mothers, have to love that. Number two, you can scoop them up in the baby position and, after their initial shock, they snuggle right in and get happy about it. You can even squeeze their feet up by their heads - no problemLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1101780359163483022004-11-29T20:05:00.000-06:002004-11-29T20:05:59.163-06:00Emma to Morgan (in kitchen alone):
"What do you think -- applesauce or low-carb jello?"
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1101315277162153862004-11-24T10:53:00.000-06:002004-11-24T10:54:37.163-06:00I just saw on news headlines that Martha Stewart was offering a Thanksgiving message from jail. I didn't click because I have no doubt that it is, "For the love of god, don't use Stove Top!!!"Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1098833867969545972004-10-26T18:34:00.000-05:002004-10-26T18:40:32.913-05:00I Think I'm Being Used
I'm fairly certain that I'm being used by my cat. She sashay's in, eats, and then meows to go back out. Sometimes she will take a nap. Often, she will complain if the bowl of kitten chow isn't heaping full. Occasionally, to treat us, she will flip over, encourage us to play and then rip our hands to shreds. If we're really lucky, she'll taking a huge leap at the dog, Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1098071488806693842004-10-17T22:46:00.001-05:002004-10-17T22:51:28.806-05:00South Beach, Day Five
Five days on SB (well, my personal modified version, heh) - Pounds lost: 3.
Not swell, but not so bad considering:
Foods Eaten:
hard salami, cheddar cheese, provel cheese, brick cheese, velveeta (pretend) cheese, black olives, red wine, Michelob Ultra Beer, tons of roast pork, pork&n&beans, eggs (and more cheese!), pork sausage, JITB salads.
As always, once I get into Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1097816224403025972004-10-14T23:55:00.000-05:002004-10-14T23:57:04.403-05:00We went to a bag sale bust, then decided to go to a thrit store in the shitty. Okay, so fine. I’m with my friend Sara and her kids (4 & 2). We park the ole minivan and go in.
When we come out Sara’s friend, Jane, is like, dude – why are your hazard lights on? She’s like WTF? We’re like huh? The meter maid comes and tells me that my friend is going to be really upset.
Someone (from Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1097561287752781042004-10-12T01:06:00.000-05:002004-10-12T13:30:14.716-05:00If....
all you can think to sing, after your guests leave is, " It's a family traditon......"
you might be a redneck.
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1097116544490581782004-10-06T21:25:00.000-05:002004-10-06T21:35:44.490-05:00Real Live Humans
The cool thing about meeting someone and wanting to reproduce with them is the result of human issue. I mean, as mammals, we are like, Must Make Baby With You. An often, we mammals find a way. And you cook them in your body and you grow them and then, WAM, there ya go - RLH! The next thing you know, they are wanting to tell you shit and you're like, hell!, I just grew you Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1097067605787559222004-10-06T07:52:00.000-05:002004-10-06T08:00:05.786-05:00Worse Than a Collie Over Here
So I've let my hair grow long again, mainly because it's just easier. In the past, my decision to cut my long hair has always included the hair loss pain in the ass. Some facts -- the average brunette loses 50 hairs a day, a blonde - 100. Even though my hair darkened with pregnancy each time, I must still be a blonde at heart (head) - I lose a hell of a lot.
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1096741788684188042004-10-02T13:13:00.000-05:002004-10-02T13:29:48.683-05:00mom, interrupted
I was sick this past week for a couple of days. Well, I'm still sick, but not incapacitated. However, for 2.5 days I layed on the couch with my nose leaking copiously and continuously. Not fun. Even though my own mother was here, it became frighteningly apparent how much I do around here - even though it appears I do nothing (but thrift shop like a crazy manic).
The house Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1095640119087547732004-09-19T19:14:00.000-05:002004-09-19T19:28:39.086-05:00You know, I've always wondered why people feel so responsible for other people's suicides....then I myself, tonight, think - if I'd just been a little older, I could have helped. My uncle committed suicide when I was in my 20's. He was the youngest sibling in my Dad's family. He was the unexpected baby. He waited until his Mother died to do it. His daughter was 2 years younger than me and myLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1095620266271387952004-09-19T13:56:00.000-05:002004-09-19T13:57:46.273-05:00Morgan, singing:
"Somebody once told me....the world is macaroni; he ate a big piece of the treeee......."
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1093489409618758212004-08-25T22:02:00.000-05:002004-08-25T22:03:29.616-05:00My betta knows that it freaks me out when she sleeps on the bottom of his bowl - yet, he does it anyway.
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1093316353853774622004-08-23T21:49:00.000-05:002004-08-23T21:59:13.853-05:00Today was the first day of school. Emma's first day of 2nd grade and Morgan's first day of Kindergarten. The morning preparation was fairly uneventful. I was trying to avoid Morgan getting upset about anything so that things could move on at a smooth pace. Arrival, photographing and playgroup went fine. When I dropped Emma off in her class line, I have to leave her there and take Morgan to Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1091081588891971642004-07-29T01:07:00.000-05:002004-07-29T01:13:08.890-05:00So, it's 1 a.m. and I'm going to be a Good Wife and make tuna salad for my husband's lunch tomorrow. The eggs are boiled and I'm opening the tuna. By the second can, the cat is winding around my legs meowing like she's being killed, but she doesn't know why. The dog, the good one, is sitting and standing up and then sitting again, just in case I didn't know he was sitting. He's looking at theLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1088823009195378302004-07-02T21:30:00.000-05:002004-07-02T21:50:09.196-05:00So, I bathed.
Not that un-washing is a habit of mine, but bathing is not on the regular menu. It's more of the appetizer that you only order occasionally. Plus, it's not for the real meal, it's just for gluttony. Until now, the bath was simply for the jets, wine and candle, not for actual washing.
As we now have no shower, I bathed. So did Steve. The cat curiously walked around the edge Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1088813764411868142004-07-02T19:15:00.000-05:002004-07-02T19:16:04.413-05:00"I'm not going to go anywhere - except where I'm going." Morgan, referring to god knows what.
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1088302318346605692004-06-26T21:10:00.000-05:002004-06-26T21:11:58.346-05:00Morgan, watching Designer's Challenge on HGTV:
"Oh, they just cannot decide because all of the designers are SO GREAT!"
Emma: "Why are they having a yard sale?"
Me: "To sell some of their stuff and get rid of it."
Emma: "Okay, but they're losing a lot of memories."
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1086838587731981572004-06-09T22:29:00.000-05:002004-06-09T22:36:27.730-05:00Cat Math
So, this cat is maybe a loser. (Heh, maybe I should write *looser*....I love it when people type than when intending 'loser' - it always makes me say to myself, 'looser than what?', but whatever). The kitten is in Math 101. You know, you see that cat sitting there, looking at the counter, and you can practically *see* the math going on in the bubble above it's head. This kitten has Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1086472905533359782004-06-05T16:53:00.000-05:002004-06-05T17:01:45.533-05:00Camping Tips from the Indoorsy
So, we camped, June 1-3. It was fantastic really - that's the summary. I had a wonderful time and the humans the and food were unbelieveable. However, I'm not very good at this camping stuff, having come from 'why would you go outside?' genetic stock. I thought I'd throw together a little, Lessons Learned:
Cook your intended cookable food beforehand. We had Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1086061420034407022004-05-31T22:41:00.000-05:002004-05-31T22:43:40.033-05:00I notice that Steve is putting his jeans on the table now instead of the floor. A few nights ago, Hank peed on them. I told Steve that I could just see Hank walking up to them, smelling them and going, 'Yep, he's mine' and lifting the ole leg.
Harley is in love with the kitten. And no, I know what you're thinking - it's not ONLY because of the unlimited butt sniffing opportunities that she Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1085719741660780552004-05-27T23:46:00.000-05:002004-05-27T23:49:01.660-05:00Recent Quotes of Interest:
"Those are not your panties."
- Lola, after seeing her mother's panties because she threw a 5-minute hissy fit/tantrum wanting to do so.
"The milk is good today; the cows must have stood still."
- Emma, a week before turning seven
"I'm smart now that I'm five."
- Morgan, in the van, 5th birthdayLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1085631156744161742004-05-26T23:08:00.000-05:002004-05-26T23:12:36.743-05:00I cleaned my refrigerator out a couple of days ago and it's still such a shock to open the door. It's amazing. I had the same experience with my van a few weeks back. Took a couple of hours, a wheelbarrow for the trash and a full bottle of Oxy Clean, but it looked (and smelled) great. HA! After three weekends of yardsaling (which, by the way, is exhausting) it is full of food wrappers, Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1085363790904653742004-05-23T20:54:00.000-05:002004-05-23T20:56:30.903-05:00Due to circumstances beyond my control - or at least not of my making, I've gained and lost a grown and ill cat and gained a kitten. I've been totally bewitched by the kitten, I must admit. But tonight, she is galloping through the house like kittens do and I am smitten. She's a part-timer here but, really, I'm having trouble allowing her to go to her home or origin. She's so dear. Today I Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1085274948640723772004-05-22T20:13:00.000-05:002004-05-22T20:15:48.640-05:00Today was Morgan's dance recital. It was too charming. I actually remember it being much more grueling with Emma, but maybe I am more seasoned. There was a certain amount of boredom after hair/make-up and before lining-up, but it was very minimal. The excitement of the situation inspired me to open the box of DV tapes and install one in the video-cam that I don't know how to use. I figured Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1085274633584837652004-05-22T20:08:00.000-05:002004-05-22T20:10:33.583-05:00Emma, going through the yard sale purchases for the day: "Oh Mommy! You got _No, David!_ -- that's a classic!"Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1085011622126294842004-05-19T19:06:00.000-05:002004-05-19T19:07:02.126-05:00It May Have Rained a Hell of a Lot if:
There are four mallards in the ditch in front of Walmart.
Late Breaking News:
Emma and Morgan have found a rollie polie olie and a 'centipeter'.
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1084712458499945722004-05-16T07:46:00.000-05:002004-05-16T08:00:58.500-05:00I awoke to the light from the window shining on the dagger that was impacted in my forehead. I lay there squinting from the pain while trying to decide what exactly was the problem. Yes, there was wine at the MNO last night and yes, I did go to bed at 2:00 a.m., but still - the pain was much too fierce to be explained by those two things. I moved my head experimentally . . . arrrrrgh . . . Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1084280524390307392004-05-11T07:39:00.000-05:002004-05-11T08:02:04.390-05:00I just fed the fish. Some of the stupider ones crack me up. They just come to the top, mouths open. No food in sight yet, but optimism is aplenty. It's like chewing in advance, hoping someone will throw food in your mouth.
My husband is returning from Arkansas today. I doubt he'll beat the trash men though, so I should get off my toocas and roll the can out to the end of the sidewalk.
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1083642999421203072004-05-03T22:56:00.000-05:002004-05-03T23:00:35.670-05:00Well dance season appears to be in full swing. It just goes along all school year, without making any trouble, then WHAM! So, I bought two recital tickets tonight (can't buy more until next week!), filled out the photographer paperwork, paid for the final month, realized I needed to bring the Morg in full splendour to class next week, realized I need to secure child-size-five tan pantyhose by Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1083534672906586342004-05-02T16:51:00.000-05:002004-05-02T17:00:06.140-05:00I'm sitting in a new (to me) computer chair and man, does it feel different! I've had the same one for over eight years I believe. It is a mere skeleton now - the cushy part in the seat was all worn out so I would frequently get poked in the ass by the innards. Actually, I don't miss it at all. Well, okay, maybe I do miss the pee stain from Morgan a little bit.
Cleaned the van out today. Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1082292798793229012004-04-18T07:48:00.000-05:002004-04-18T07:57:13.983-05:00So....yesterday I fed all of the kids spaghetti (no red sauce, thank god), but had about half a pound left over. It sat on the table for hours, then finally before I went to bed, I decided to deal with it. Unfortunately, I didn't think it over very much. I turned on the faucet and flipped the pan over, turning on the disposal. Those noodles disappeared in one second. I left the disposal Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1081904069977076952004-04-13T19:33:00.000-05:002004-04-13T19:58:19.170-05:00Okay now, Day Two of no flour, no sugar. Not doing too bad. Evenings are going to be the hardest, I'm sure. I remembered my sister-in-law saying, in a mad Atkins panic, "Have you ever noticed how SWEET lettuce tastes?????" I replied, diplomatically, that I was sure that after no sugar, other foods would appear to be more sweet. Then I kindly asked how long she had been on the diet. "Oh, Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-107996080964602022004-03-22T07:06:00.000-06:002004-03-22T07:10:09.780-06:00Lola: "Daddy is a bad gourl . . . he's a **bad gourl**."Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1079478841761945772004-03-16T17:12:00.000-06:002004-03-16T17:18:24.170-06:00Lola's latest phrase: "I can't not like it," meaning, I do not like it. I called Michelle this morning and she answered the phone, "I can't not like mornings." She means it too - her house is straight from the depths of hell in the mornings with fights about what they don't want to wear, how they want this cereal and not that and how the pop-tarts are the wrong flavor. And then there's the Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1078888315096425782004-03-09T21:11:00.000-06:002004-03-09T21:14:58.763-06:00Ginny: "I took all of your plants outside today and watered them."
Me: "Even the ones in the bathroom? Were they thrilled?"
Ginny: "Well, they stopped screaming."
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1077651368784995662004-02-24T13:33:00.000-06:002004-02-24T13:38:53.186-06:00Just a regular stay-at-home Mom day today. Heck, it could be the 50's. Morgan, who taught herself to ride her bike (2-wheeler!) yesterday went out to learn to turn around. The cold and the wind were her enemies though, and she fell off and gave up for the day.
On the other hand, Morgan taught Lola to use a mouse and I've been listing auctions like a madwoman on eBay. My back is almost soreLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1077131401184211802004-02-18T12:50:00.000-06:002004-02-18T13:12:38.013-06:00So, I'm all decked out as a flybaby today (well today beginning after *noon*) to attempt to see if it works to discourage me from being so 'depressive and lazy' and Maura to eloquently put it (about herself though). Dressed here, in actual day-time-wear and wearing shoes. Not lace-ups, but hell I didn't say I'd gone completely crazy. They're clogs, but they make me taller and somehow that Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1074134807165675502004-01-14T20:02:00.000-06:002004-01-14T20:48:37.593-06:00Walking Morgan back to the van after dance class Monday night. She saw something on the ground in the parking lot. She says, "Someone threw their gum wrapper on the ground. That's not very appropriate."
Last night, playing UNO: Daddy was getting frustrated at not winning [ahem]. Morgan tells him, "Daddy, it's **only** a game...."
Emma, meanwhile, has informed me just in the last 12 hours Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1070866393526875732003-12-08T00:52:00.000-06:002003-12-08T00:54:14.000-06:00You do the Hankie-Pankie and you turn yourself around....*that's* what it's all about.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1069768675947430812003-11-25T07:44:00.000-06:002003-11-25T07:58:39.653-06:00Household Tip
When you can no longer get to the washing machine -- it's probably time to do laundry!
School is out for six days, starting today. I am going to have a Girl's Day Out with the kids. We're going to the New Mall and do anything they want (with the exception of ice skating; I'm not ready to bust my ass so close to Thanksgiving). I expect junk food, ice cream, theater and toys to Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1069381873377763512003-11-20T20:28:00.000-06:002003-11-20T20:31:50.640-06:00Now Native-American Summer was divine, way above expectations. It was 75 degrees day after *day* in October. It was a balmy Halloween with shorts and beer. It was trick-or-treat in lightweight costumes and no chill whatsoever. But now, this, THIS is an excellent bonus chaser.
Today, needless to say, it was 76 and heaven. And hell, it still it. It's 8:30 p.m. and both back doors are open.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1066781002183817552003-10-21T18:58:00.000-05:002003-10-21T19:03:22.330-05:00So, I'll be darned - an exciting day in the neighborhood. Jennifer completed her interview and is on her way back home. Morgan sobbed for quite some time upon her departure. Eventually, peach-mango applesauce cheered her. Last night, right after I returned from Michelle's, some guy in the apartment building behind and over from us, was murdered. While the police were going door-to-door to Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1066362593768392942003-10-16T22:49:00.000-05:002003-10-16T22:49:53.256-05:00"Getting Hank to stop barking is like trying to keep Rush from e-mailing his maid." - Michelle.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1066252852566518882003-10-15T16:17:00.000-05:002003-10-15T16:20:52.466-05:00Today is Jennifer's birthday. And she is thirteen years older than the day I first set eyes on her. And that is half of her lifetime. Now that is trippy. Of course I feel like I've known her all of my life, but lord, it's almost true! So happy birthday Jennifer! Man, did you turn out great.
Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1066014798706130532003-10-12T22:08:00.000-05:002003-10-12T22:13:18.806-05:00That's What You Get for Not Dying
This skinny, sweet old chap was behind me at Market Basket yesterday. He was buying one head of lettuce and one jar of horseradish. Both girls were with me and he commented, "I see you've got your help with you." I said, yes, plenty of help (in a rare, unannoyed way because he didn't immediate annoy me) -- and he said he'd 'had ten'. I said, "Ten children?" Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1064954294580499162003-09-30T15:26:00.000-05:002003-09-30T15:38:14.360-05:00There's always that one day that you've donned your socks and your sweatshirt and you're doing the laundry. You get something out of the dryer to fold it and think, 'What was I (or that kid) doing wearing *this*???' because it's a halter or a tank top and you are currently freezing. It happens that quickly. Last week it was 84, this week it's 48. There will be more warm days (in fact, today Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1064839863463468762003-09-29T07:15:00.000-05:002003-09-29T10:14:11.183-05:00I'm so cut off from society. This is the third weekend without the satellite. The third Sunday that has passed. The third Carnivale that I have missed. It's hopeless -- I'll have to wait three years and get the DVD. I'll be in my 40's before I watch that show. Note to self to call the satellite company and ask for more money back. I swear, and it won't be so hard to believe, that I've Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3625991.post-1063563824460507692003-09-14T13:18:00.000-05:002003-09-14T13:23:44.430-05:00My goodness, what a shitty blogger I am. Emma started soccer yesterday - this year they have a goalie *and* they keep score. They lost 2-3. Her best friend is now on the team so her already-positive feelings about the sport have increased. She even chose to go to the game tomorrow night instead of her second dance class.
Morgan is loving preschool and is, like last year, making up Tall TalesLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02389398852271984169noreply@blogger.com